my new home :)

NEW BLOG!

you can visit and follow my new blog at betweenthegaps.wordpress.com

:)

it's December once again and it is the time for that something that i really suck at doing: buying gifts. i really don't know why but i consider it a big problem on choosing what gifts to buy. it's really not difficult if i really know the person since i would most probably know what to give him/her. but when it comes to relatives, it's been a bit of a problem and i always end up asking my sister for gift ideas for them.

i know it may doesn't matter what you give someone but i become OC when it comes to certain things. i hate the feeling when you give someone something and they don't enjoy it that much. parang nagsayang ka lang ng pera so to speak. but asking them what they want is just giving it away. mas maganda kung surprise.

anyway, i hope i get the hang of this choosing which gifts to give thing. it's really difficult considering the number of relatives that you want to give something to. add to that other gift-giving days of the year (birthdays, anniversaries, etc.). but i think sister dear won't run out of ideas yet. i can always ask her anyway. XD

“The applause was deafening. Dozens upon dozens of people - each as inspirational and as a part of this era as the next - surrounded them, cheering, smiling through their tears.

Emma was the one to grab at their sleeves and pull them in. The golden trio, which had hugged so often in the past, was now locked in an embrace so loving and so desperate that suddenly all else seemed to melt away. They separated only ever so slightly to look at one another, to exchange within seconds all the words, love, and memories that ten years had made.

Dan was blinking rapidly. On his left, tilting her head up, Emma swallowed as her chin trembled. But it was Rupert who, with a distinct and seldom-used ferocity, told them, “Thank you,” before a single tear danced down his face.

The roar around them rose in their ears again as they all broke down, melting into one another, now weeping freely, feeling so much happiness and despair at once that it threatened to overtake them. When they finally pulled away, their hands remained tightly linked; they stood there, in a triangle, staring at one another and at all of the friends - the family - that continued to clap on every side.

Like phoenixes, they would have to embrace these ashes and rise from them once more. The prospect was both thrilling and terrifying.

But one thing was for sure.
In this instance, at the very heart of the flames, they knew deep inside - the magic would never end."

reposted from dailypotter.tumblr.com

^_^

tattoos are honest confessions. to put ink on one's skin is like having the courage to tell a story with the risk of letting the world know. tattoos should not be for the others but for one's own reasons. may it be another person or a special event in their lives, tattoos are stories and when you have a story to tell, you don't usually tell it to everyone. you tell it to the people you trust. to the people you love. tattoos tell the stories and experiences that make the person. it is a representation. this is
the reason why i like them hidden. they're more special, more intimate, sacred. and despite the pain, it becomes a spiritual experience.

- LiA, April 7,2010

=]

genres are there to help us understand the wider scope that is music. but what's the point when instead of keeping us together, it divides us and generally defeats the definition of music being universal.

Carolyn Johnson: The joy of boredom

http://www.dallasnews.com/sharedcontent/dws/dn/opinion/points/stories/DN-johnson_23edi.ART.State.Edition1.464c4cc.html

Don't check that e-mail. Don't answer that phone. Just sit there. You might be surprised by what happens.

10:27 AM CDT on Sunday, March 23, 2008

A decade ago, those monotonous minutes were just a fact of life: time ticking away, as you gazed idly into space, stood in line, or sat in bumper-to-bumper traffic.

JAMES STEINBERG/Special Contributor

Boredom's doldrums were unavoidable, yet also a primordial soup for some of life's most quintessentially human moments. Jostled by a stranger's cart in the express checkout line, thoughts of a loved one might come to mind. A long drive home after a frustrating day could force ruminations. A pang of homesickness at the start of a plane ride might put a journey in perspective.

Increasingly, these empty moments are being saturated with productivity, communication and the digital distractions offered by an ever-expanding array of slick mobile devices. A few years ago, cellphone maker Motorola even began using the word "microboredom" to describe the ever-smaller slices of free time from which new mobile technology offers an escape. "Mobisodes," two-minute long television episodes of everything from Lost to Prison Break made for the cellphone screen, are perfectly tailored for the microbored. Cellphone games are often designed to last just minutes – simple, snack-sized diversions like Snake, solitaire and Tetris. Social networks like Twitter and Facebook turn every mundane moment between activities into a chance to broadcast feelings and thoughts, even if it is just to triple-tap a keypad with the words "I am bored."

But are we too busy twirling through the songs on our iPods – while checking e-mail, while changing lanes on the highway – to consider whether we are giving up a good thing?

We are most human when we feel dull. Lolling around in a state of restlessness is one of life's greatest luxuries – one not available to creatures that spend all their time pursuing mere survival. To be bored is to stop reacting to the external world, and to explore the internal one. It is in these times of reflection that people often discover something new, whether it is an epiphany about a relationship or a new theory about the way the universe works.

Granted, many people emerge from boredom feeling that they have accomplished nothing. But is accomplishment really the point of life? There is a strong argument that boredom – so often parodied as a glassy-eyed drooling state of nothingness – is an essential human emotion that underlies art, literature, philosophy, science and even love.

"If you think of boredom as the prelude to creativity, and loneliness as the prelude to engagement of the imagination, then they are good things," said Dr. Edward Hallowell, a psychiatrist and author of the book CrazyBusy. "They are doorways to something better, as opposed to something to be abhorred and eradicated immediately."

Public health officials often bemoan the obesity epidemic, the unintended consequence of a modern lifestyle that allows easy access to calories. Technology seems to offer a similar proposition: a wide array of distractions that offer the boon of connection, but at a cost. Already, mobile technology has shaped the way people interact and communicate. People no longer make plans in the same way; public spaces have become semi-private bubbles of conversation; and things like getting a busy signal or being unreachable seem foreign, even quaint.

Today, distraction from monotony is not merely available; it is almost unavoidable.

Perhaps nothing illuminates the speed of social change better than the new fear of disconnection. People driving a car or waiting in a doctor's office have always had some distractions available to them, from the radio to National Geographic. But until the advent of connected devices, they were still, fundamentally, alone in some way.

Today, there is a growing fear of the prospect of being untethered in the world without the security blanket of a cellphone. In the timescale of human inventions, the mobile phone is still new, but it is already a crucial part of the trinity of things people fear to forget when they leave the house – keys, wallet, phone.

"There is this hyper-anxiety over feeling lonely or disconnected," said Kathleen Cumiskey, a professor of psychology and women's studies at the College of Staten Island who says her stepdaughter sleeps with her cellphone at arm's length and considers turning the device off unthinkable. "Our society is perpetually anxious, and a way to alleviate the anxiety is to delve into something that's very within our control, pleasurable and fun. ... It feels like it has all the makings of addiction."

In a way, the entrepreneurs looking to capitalize on the small moments of spare time that are sprinkled through modern life parallel the pharmaceutical industry. A growing chorus of mental health specialists has begun to question whether normal sadness and social anxiety are being transformed into disorders that people believe need to be cured – by the companies offering elixirs. The tech industry may be doing the same thing with disconnection.

Many of the original arguments for having a cellphone – safety, security, emergencies – never figure into the advertisements. Like the commercials that show frowning people transformed into smiling, kitten-cuddling normality, technology companies project a happy world of connection where to intentionally disconnect seems freakish, questionable, undeniably an ailment.

Society has accepted connection so well that it takes a step back to see exactly how far things have come. Instead of carrying their entire social universe in a pocket, people used to walk out of their houses and into the world. Today, not picking up the phone for an hour is an act of defiance.

Perhaps understandably, boredom has never caught the attention of the psychological world. Emotions like anxiety, fear and anger have been subjected to a much more thorough examination than merely feeling drab, according to Richard Ralley, a lecturer in psychology at Edge Hill University in England.

"What's gone wrong with the psychology of emotion is that the ones that are easy to do are the ones that have been researched: fear, threat, fear, threat, again and again and again," Dr. Ralley said. "A lot of other emotions that really make us human – pride, for instance – we kind of avoid."

So, Dr. Ralley set out to examine boredom more closely, with the idea that the feeling must have a purpose. Just looking around, it was evident that children quell boredom quite naturally, with creativity. But as people get older, anxious parents and cranky children demand more and more specific stimuli, whether it is a video game or a hot new phone.

As Dr. Ralley studied boredom, it came to make a kind of sense: If people are slogging away at an activity with little reward, they get annoyed and find themselves feeling bored. If something more engaging comes along, they move on. If nothing does, they may be motivated enough to think of something new themselves. The most creative people, he said, are known to have the greatest toleration for long periods of uncertainty and boredom.

"When we're writing deeply, writing thoughtfully, we are often trying to communicate with ourselves and trying to communicate what ultimately can't be communicated – the greatest mysteries of the world: What is truth? What is beauty? What is being?" said Eric G. Wilson, an English professor at Wake Forest University and author of the new book Against Happiness.

Arthur Wright, 55, who works in the travel industry, said that he refuses to carry a cellphone precisely because he has seen the effects every time he ventures into one of the confession booths our public spaces have become.

"You hear these stupid conversations. ... You know, it's just 'I'm bored,' and they'll call and chit-chat on the phone," Mr. Wright said. "'I'm almost there. I'm turning the corner right now.' ... What would they do without it? It's like kids who use a calculator in school, and they can't add."

Connectivity, of course, has serious advantages. Parents can check in with their kids. Friends separated by hundreds of miles can have a conversation. People feel safer.

Still, there has been surprisingly little public discussion of the broad sociological and psychological impact the technology will have. Like much change, it has crept up on people and radically changed behavior and expectations in ways few people could have predicted. At one time, the car was a novelty – things like getting gas and driving on good roads were difficult to do. Today, the modern world is built around an automotive infrastructure, and is almost impossible to navigate without one.

"We set up a society that functions that way," said Rich Ling, a researcher at the Norwegian telecom firm Telenor and author of New Tech, New Ties. "And the mobile phone is starting to work in that way."

But as it becomes more difficult to imagine a world without constant connectivity, the very concept of "microboredom" may begin to lower people's tolerance for even a second of empty time.

Paradoxically, as cures for boredom have proliferated, people do not seem to feel less bored; they simply flee it with more energy, flitting from one activity to the next. Dr. Ralley has noticed a kind of placid look among his students over the past few years, a "laptop culture" that he finds perplexing.

They have more channels to be social; there are always things to do. And yet people seem oddly numb. They are not quite bored, but not really interested either.

That means steeping in uninterrupted boredom may be the first step toward feeling connected. It "may take a little bit of tolerance of an initial feeling of boredom, to discover a comfort level with not being linked in and engaged and stimulated every second," said Jerome Wakefield, a professor of social work at New York University and co-author of The Loss of Sadness. "There's a level of knowing yourself, of coming back to baseline and knowing who you truly are."

Or, just go ahead. Your phone is vibrating with a message, your e-mail is piling up, a hilarious YouTube video is waiting to entertain you.

Me, too.

Carolyn Y. Johnson covers business for the Boston Globe. Her e-mail address is cjohnson@globe.com.

~~ tama tama. T.T

"my goal is not to wake up at forty with a bitter realization that i wasted my life at a job i hate because i was forced to decide on a career in my teens." - daria